A Letter to My 18 Year Old Self

letter to myself, lauren binley, blog post, retrospective, journeytothecentreofnewexperiences
Pictures from the last few years

Hey 🙂

I hope today is a good day for you because I have so much to tell you! So you know we applied for university and were really hoping we’d get into Bangor and be able to see the mountains everyday, well we did! We graduated last year with a 2.1 in French and Spanish! I know, I’m just as happy about it as you are. But don’t get me wrong it was a really difficult thing to achieve but we did it!

Because of that we were able to live in France and Spain for a year as well and we didn’t freak out about it (okay, we freaked out a little but not enough for us to actually stop enjoying ourselves.) The travelling around also gave us the chance and the motivation to start vlogging and blogging more regularly too, and through youtube you meet some great friends! You’ve only met one in person so far though, but I reckon we will meet the others in the future. And no, we haven’t gained hundreds and thousands of subscribers but we have enough and there are a little more every month so although we may not be at the mark you’d have wished for us we are slowly getting there! But I’m just grateful that we managed to find some great people to talk to and they are from all over the world!

How strange to be talking about subscribers and making regular videos when at the moment you are just uploading silly videos of you singing covers! But don’t stop doing it! You will enjoy it so much and it will make you love singing even more than you do now! I don’t upload covers that often any more, mainly because I don’t feel like I’m good enough. I don’t know what gave you the confidence to do it and not feel judged and ridiculed (and yes we do get a lot of ridicule in the future but you brush it off and laugh, glad that at least you are the target for this hateful venom people spill and not some other person would let it crush them just a little bit more.) I’m always tempted to do it, I’ve recorded a few videos of me singing recently but they never seem to make it off the camera and onto the channel. Maybe I will be able to find your confidence from somewhere!

I know you’re feeling rubbish at the moment and you’re wishing that things had turned out differently but don’t worry things do pick up, I promise. You meet an absolute muppet from the internet and you spend 11 months with him, admittedly there were a few good times but now I just look back and wonder what I was doing with my life! But we meet a great person at university. He’s called Ryan and we are still together. He makes us feel great and he really cares about us and will do anything to make sure that we are happy. But he’s in Berlin at the moment so we’re doing the long distance thing, it’s not too difficult but you have to remember that talking is key! You will get through it 🙂

Also, you’re an auntie! Tasha had a baby towards the end of 2014, a beautiful little boy called Michael. He’s so cute but you only see him once when he’s born until Christmas because you end up having to go Spain. But when you go back home for 3 weeks you see him a lot and he’s started to teethe and thinks it’s wonderful to just sit biting on your thumb, but it’s not too painful!

So although it may seem like life isn’t turning out so great at the moment things are going to turn around for you and you will feel so happy. Also we pass our driving test, eventually! But we don’t have a car yet and we are currently saving up for one. Hopefully when we get back from Spain we will have the money (yes we go to Spain again but this time to teach as part of the British Council scheme like you’ve always wanted to.)

You will have some sad times but it only helps you find the better moments! Just remember that and don’t let yourself get too down over the things that aren’t important.

Lauren 🙂 x

11 Replies to “A Letter to My 18 Year Old Self”

  1. Dear 18 year old Lauren don't go out with the muppet. Skip that bit 😁.

  2. I love letters to our younger and older selves! Sounds like you already have and are going to make lots of amazing memories over the years, and live a very full and happy life.
    I'm only 17 atm so can't really write the same to myself, but I hope I do things that I will look back on and be happy about!
    lily x

  3. Well I'd seen other people doing them and I thought it was a great way to say some things and it really helps to put them into perspective. Thanks, I sometimes feel like I haven't done a lot but then I remember I've travelled around Europe and although I have no fixed home yet I am loving what I'm doing!
    You could write one to a future self? 🙂 You could say what you hope you will be like and what you are wondering your life will be like when you get to that age. It might good for you have a more informal way to write down what you want for the future as if you are talking to your future self. If you do, I would love to read it!
    I'm sure you will, you will obviously have some moments you think "why did I do that?!"but we all do!
    Thanks for your comment, it was lovely to read! 😀

  4. Lauren, I can't even put into words how much I genuinely loved this post. So well written, great humour… I loved it, I really did. Now binge reading the rest of your blog 😉


  5. Thanks so much! I am really proud of this post as this was a spontaneous idea! I hope you are enjoying some of the others just as much! 🙂

  6. Great post! It's funny how much can change in 5 years isn't it? It's great that you have found happiness with Ryan. I think we all meet and spend time with at least one muppet in our lives before finding a good egg! x

  7. It really is! If I hadn't thought about it the other day I wouldn't have realised quite how much has changed! Thanks! That is really true! And there are so many muppets around as well haha 🙂 x

  8. Hey Lollalong,
    Another great post from you.
    I think your blog deserves a little more recognition so I've nominated you for the Liebster Award.
    To find out more check out my post.

    Take Care,
    -Bex Oox

  9. Thank you so much Bex! This comment has honestly made my day! I will have to get this done as soon as I can 🙂 x

  10. […] If you enjoyed this you may enjoy A Letter to My 18 Year Old Self […]

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